November 1, 2014

Time is getting away from me. It’s worrisome. I’ve wondered if I could conceptualize time in 2 or 3 dimensions instead of the linear way that the calendar and clock have structured for me, how would that be different. If each second could be experienced in its width or depth what would that be like? Listening… I hear a car go by the campground, the coach is creaking in the ceiling and side where the sun is warming it up. The keyboard clicks as I write these words. If I look around, I see the interior of the motor coach. Cabinets around the upper perimeter. A little clutter, newspaper, coffee cup, water bottle and shelf liner among other things on the ledge that surrounds the camper. Outside it is a bright sunny day with cars and other campers visible outside the windows. Trees in various colors as the season changes. The flowers I bought yesterday are on the ledge behind the couch. The air in the camper smells slightly of last night’s potroast, is very warm from the floor being on and the sunshine on the coach. My mind wanders to the future expecting Don to return and the past looking on the butterfly on the visor that was a gift from the person who bought my house. If I stay in a linear time frame, I feel kind of panicky and want to hold on to it and keep it from getting away. I’m retired now and of retirement age. That means that there are definitely fewer years ahead of me than behind. It’s not good to spend time thinking that way. I will try to keep on widening and deepening my conception of time.

We are near Branson, MO now and people have asked if we are going to any shows. I hadn’t thought about that. We’re just here because we didn’t want to drive all the way to Little Rock. Once we came here, we decided to stay a couple of days because we didn’t feel like moving so soon. In some ways, being a full-timer is a lot like living in a stick house.

Someone gave us some trout at Bennet Springs

You just live in it…. Sleep, eat, sit around, drink coffee, clean, do laundry, get out and get some exercise, watch tv, read, write, play Words with Friends. My Words with Friends friends are mostly retired and like me don’t have a lot better to do than work on playing a word. Often it seems like I no sooner get a word played than someone plays one back. I never seem to get caught up like before everyone retired. I taught Don how to play cribbage so frequently in the evening we engage in a friendly game. He wins sometimes and as do I.